Getting Into a New Style: You Only Got One Shot

Hey everyone! If the meme title hasn't already driven you away, welcome. Today I'm going to be talking about some recent insight I had relating to alternative fashion. If you don't already know who Safia Nygaard is, I highly recommend checking out her youtube (but pls cone back afterwords), since she's the one who sparked the inspo for this post.

So for those of you who don't know about her, Safiya Nygaard is a youtuber who makes a lot of experimental videos, such as melting lipsticks together, buying from questionable online brands, and trying fashions that aren't hers. The latter is the inspiration for this post. One of the things Safiya is known for is trying out different styles, whether it be dressing up like other popular youtubers, trying different decade's fashions, or trying alternative fashions, she does it all! I've watched her videos for years and these type of videos were always my favorites, but it didn't click until recently when I rewatched her Lolita fashion makeover what made her style experiments different from my own: She goes all in. And I could definitely take a page from her book.

So what does that mean, going all in when trying a style? In Safiya's case it means doing research in the style or styles she plans to represent, finding an expert in that style, and buying and wearing an entire outfit (or outfits) to wear for a video. Needless to say the majority of you reading this probably aren't Youtubers, but there's still a lot to learn from this format, even if you aren't making outfits for Youtube videos or instagram posts.

#1: Research!
The first thing anyone should do when going into a new fashion is research. What are the main aspects that sets this style apart from others? Are there different substyles? Start a pinterest board, folder on your phone or computer, or a list and start taking note of what makes that style. For example, bell shaped skirts, soft lace and ruffles, and bows are some of the key aspects of Lolita fashion. Predominantly black clothing, detailing, and extravagent or edgy hair are key points for Goth fashion.

For substyles of a larger fashion whole, what makes them stand out from each other? Since Goth fashion is such a huge umbrella term, let's use that as an example. The points I used above when describing it are so vauge because there's so many different styles, it's hard to pinpoint specific details and say 'oh yeah, all Goth fashion has _____.' Romantic Goth has softer silhoettes, corsets, lace, and an overall dark, dreamy sort of feel, where as Traditional Goth tends to have fishnets, teased hair, and casual clothing with a general 'eff the world' sort of feeling. (I'm not a huge expert on every Goth substyle, so sorry if I'm a bit off in places.) If you're getting into a style that has many different substyles, you should do enough research to be able to tell the difference between them and decide which you like and don't like. Also worth noting is that different eras can count as different substyles, even if they have the same general name. If you wore Lolita fashion from the late 80s and early 90s today and posted in a Lolita fashion group, you'd have a lot of people telling you that it's not Lolita fashion because the style's changed so much over the years it's become it's own substyle or sub-genera.

#2: Find an Expert
Thanks to the ease of using the internet and searching for things online, it's pretty easy to find an expert on many alternative styles. Unfortunately it may be hard to find an individual who will personally walk you through putting together outfits in a style in one go, but there's plenty of blogs and videos out there where people describe what makes a fashion. There's also groups where you can ask for advice on outfits you've put together or are thinking of putting together. If you're still unsure where to go after doing your research on a style, groups like this can be extremely helpful as you don't have to rely on one person in particular to help you.

#3: Buy an Entire Outfit
So this part of Safiya's videos is what really hit me: She always buys and wears a whole, complete outfit, makeup, hair, and all. When I look back at some of my previous outfits and style attempts, I realized that's what I've been missing. I've done pretty much nothing but research, research, and more research to the point of becoming an expert in a lot of styles while simultaneously half-assing my wardrobe and outfits. So I'm basically an expert, but no one would believe me if they saw the way I dressed compared to others who have more extensive wardrobes than me. And this is why I've struggled with feeling like I fit into certain fashions because I didn't always go all in when I wore them.

I recognize we can't all walk into Shibuya 109 or a giant Goth wearhouse and walk out with an entire outfit, hair, and makeup all put together when we start wearing a fashion, and that's fine. If you have the resources to, I highly recommend buying a complete outfit and taking the time to learn how to do proper hair and makeup to go with that style or find someone who can do the hair and makeup for you. If you're unable to, for example, drop $900 on an entire Lolita coordinate in one go, find pieces you like that would make a complete outfit and buy them one by one as you can afford to. If you can DIY or upcycle pieces while still remaining true to the fashion, great! However, what I highly recommend you DON'T do is be like me and buy things just because they're convenient and somewhat fit into the style you're trying to wear. It's a waste of time and money and you're better off just buying the thing you actually want.

Once you have a full outfit, do your hair (or wig) and makeup accordingly and wear it all together. If you end up liking the outfit, but don't want to pursue the fashion further, no worries! It was a learning experience and you can always hang onto the pieces you got and wear them as a whole some other time, you can wear the same thing as many times as you want! If you do like the style, you can use the pieces you have to expand and build a wardrobe that works together. And if you ever decide it's just really not you, you can sell the pieces or give them to a friend who does wear the style.

I hope you guys enjoyed this week's post and that it gives you an "aha" moment if you're struggling with your fashion identity like I am ❤

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Looking to the Past for a Better Future

Hey everyone. Today's post is a bit more... personal than I usually get. We're living in a crazy world right now that can feel hopeless and honestly I've been letting it get to me for a lot longer than I care to admit. So today I'm going to be talking about healing, dreams, and the future. Content warning: Mental illness and vauge mentions of suicidal tendencies

We all had dreams growing up, whether it was a dream of our future career, a dream of a different world, or just a little dream of happiness. As we get older, it's natural for our dreams to change. We're told we need to be realistic with our dreams and we start forming ambitions and goals instead. By the time we're adults, we may even forget what our childhood dreams were, or if we even had any in the first place. When I was growing up, I had dreams, but I kept them secret, even from myself at times, and instead tried to have dreams that were the same as my sister. As I grew older, my real dreams were influenced by my loves, and the dreams I expressed, while sometimes my true dreams, were more and more cries for acceptance. Whenever I did tell my true dreams, I was shut down, told to be realistic, and told they would never happen. I believed what I told, so I took my crumpled dreams and put them away. I locked more and more of myself away the older I got and began to rely on daydreams and escapism to live those "unrealistic" dreams. I put on a mask of who I thought I should be, but I was still rejected, still told I couldn't get things right, that I was a failure. And so I became angry. Angry at everything around me because no matter how hard I tried, it was never enough and I was always second place.

As I got older still and was forced to think about my future, I tried to express my real interests and dreams again. I was told that they weren't any good, that there was no point trying because it wouldn't work, because their dreams didn't work out, so why would mine? So I gave up. I ran away. I joined the very thing I'd been threatened with since I was a teenager. It both ruined my life and gave me an opportunity for a new life. I was moved away from where I grew up, to the complete opposite coast where I was alone and knew no one. I was still in contact with my family and some friends back home, but I was utterly on my own for the first time. I finally had a bit of room to breathe, I thought.

I started to try and define myself, trying on new fashions and old hobbies to see what would stick. But there were even more people telling me to step back into line. I could be whatever I wanted as long as I didn't leave that line. I had even more voices telling me what I needed to do to fit their mold of success, and when I said no, I was punished. And so I got angrier and more frustrated and hopeless. My despair swallowed me up and my life felt meaningless. Luckily I managed to hold on for a bit longer, just long enough to get help. For the first time in my life I was told that I wasn't okay, but that was okay. I was taught coping mechanisms and was able to start thinking critically about my mental health. I got better for a while, and so I stopped making appointments. I thought I'd made it through the worst of things and that I'd be able to cope with things well enough to make it through. But I was wrong.

In 2018, I left the military due to mental health issues that I couldn't resolve while I was enlisted and that wouldn't allow me to work without eventually becoming a statistic. And so they marked me as useless and kicked me out with a gold star for effort. The last two years haven't been a lot better than the four I spent in. I tried to pursue my dreams in the best way I could, but I still lacked real support. I ended up putting my dreams on pause in order to be able to survive. I finally started to make what felt like progress, but then the novel coronavirus COVID-19 came along and closed down just about everything, including my source of income, putting me back in the position I was two years ago, but under even less optimal conditions. I'm not going to lie, it's been extremely rough. But I've had a lot of time. A lot of oportunities to think about what matters the most to me.

And then, something happened. One of my favorite brands, Baby the Stars Shine bright, colaborated with Harajuku Pop to make the At Home Lolita Contest. And I saw one of my dreams again, up for the winning if I entered. And I began to remember my dreams again. I remembered the things that I loved and the things that I replaced them with because I was told that my dreams were unobtainable. And so I took a shakey first step towards reclaiming my dreams. I drew myself in a dream that I want to become a reality. And then I prayed that this dream could become a reality and drew that too. I suddenly started to remember who I wanted to be and what I wanted to do. It's going to be a long path ahead to get there, but I'm on that path now and I see where I'm going.

I hope you all can find your dreams too, whether they're lost or not. ♥
~Butterfly

Artwork by me, do not share or reproduce without permission.

At the time of writing this, the At Home Lolita contest is still underway and winners have not been announced yet. Check out my Twitter to see the results and stay tuned for future posts.

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Building a Wardrobe: Redo

Hello everyone! Who am I and why do I suddenly have things to write about again?! Quarantine and lots of downtime'll do that to ya. So today I wanted to do a bit of a rewind and look back at my Building a Wardrobe series (part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4) that I made back in 2015, five years ago at the time of writing this. While I'm not going to take them down and completely rewrite them....there are a lot of points where I sigh deeply and utter the phrase "Oh you sweet, Summer child," while rereading them and I wanted to do somewhat of an updated recap to build on what I wrote then. Needless to say, I have a lot more experience in J-fashion and life in general than I did then and times be a-changing, so here's a bit of an update on those posts, all in the convenience of one (albeit long) post. Needless to say, if you haven't already, I'd recommend reading the original posts before this one.

So at the time of writing this, I am once again rebuilding my wardrobe, because my style has changed once again. However, this time I've done more research both into the process as well as myself and what I want. One of the more notable repetitions in my original post was budgeting, saving money, and overall not spending money. While this is an important factor to consider, it shouldn't be the main focus when planning out a wardrobe. If you can afford to buy 12 new pieces a month, great! If you can only afford a new piece every three months, also great! As long as you're aware of your budget, you can go through building your wardrobe as quickly or as slowly as you need to. That being said, this is the last time I'll be mentioning budgeting in this post.

Step 1: Maybe Don't Throw Everything Out
So at the time of writing the original articles, I was very much on a Marie Kondo fueled Decluttering high. And I made a lot of decisions I'd come to regret. While the KonMarie method in and of itself isn't necessarily bad, the mentality I had going in was. Rather than focusing on getting rid of pieces you don't deem necessary anymore, start by visualizing the style you want. Whether by writing down key details you like, making pinterest boards, or following people who's style you admire, figure out what you want and what you like. If you're going from tees and jeans to full on Kuro Gyaru, you may not even feel like you have anything to start with. That's fine, we all have to start somewhere. If you already have an established wardrobe and you want to add in a new style, great! This next part should be easier.

Step 2: Start to Define What You Want
Once you have the broad brush strokes of where you want to go, it's time to start defining. Take a look at what you currently have. Does any of it fit with your intended style? If not, this is where my thrift store try-on advice comes in handy. If you already have a color pallet that works for you and you know what sort of cuts and sizes you wear, you can start envisioning your wardrobe by creating wishlists or pulling pieces from your current wardrobe that you can use. If you're starting from Kmart and aiming for Kamikaze Girl levels of lolita burando, you can still look at the items you own and ask yourself what you like about each piece or if it's just there because running around naked is generally frowned upon. You may also want to take into consideration the difference in comfort levels. Lounging in tees and jeans or a simple dress is a lot more comfortable than lounging in three layers of petticoat, a frilly dress that you may or may not actually fit in, and twelve layers of bracelets, bobby pins, and bows. If comfort is a high priority for you, keep the clothes you're comfortable in and look at options that may be better suited to regular wear.

Step 3: Make a Plan for Yourself
One of the biggest differences between my previous wardrobe building and my current wardrobe building experiences has been how I've planned. This video from The Stitchess on Youtube has been a huge help for me. Rather than estimating how many of each item type I should buy, I've made myself a constantly updating table of item types and colors I want for the baseline of my wardrobe. Rather than just window shopping and impulse buying, I go into shopping with a plan. I know what I have in my wardrobe and what I'm lacking and I can build from there. Also, trying on the items you have, whether to wear out or just for practice, you can start to get an idea of where you might have gaps to fill in your wardrobe that you might want to prioritize. As an example, I have a black shirt with mesh detailing in my Larme wardrobe that I've worn a total of once in that style. I determined that it would look best paired with pink strapped dress on top as that's a common duo in many of the Larme snaps I've seen. Since I don't currently have such a dress, I've been keeping an eye out for one to purchase. All of the other pieces I currently have can be paired several different ways, so I'm less concerned with adding other basics in.

Step 4: Build With Confidence
Once you get the hang of things, you should be able to confidently go out and purchase items you want and need for your wardrobe. If you're delving into a whole new style, make sure to do your research on what pieces would best fit you and your style. Don't be affraid to experiment and try new things. I bought my first Liz Lisa OP the other day knowing I could very well be turning right around and selling it. I learned a lot from it about that brand's sizing and I never would have known that I can wear LL pieces if I hadn't taken that first step into the unknown. Likewise, I had a lot of trial and error with other pieces in the past that gave me a better idea of what measurements I should be looking for on different styles of clothing. One of the best ways to learn is through experience and you only get experience if you're willing to take slight risks. (That being said, don't buy from Millanoo, kids. ;) )

I hope you guys enjoyed this updated perspective. Let me know in the comments how you built your wardrobes!

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Why DIY When You Could Just Buy?

Hey everyone! You might be surprised to see me back with not just one, but now two posts after a very long hiatus, but hey, quarantine and boredom give you lots of time to think. ;) So today I wanted to talk a bit (okay, maybe a lot) about how Do it Yourself, or DIY, has changed over the last 10+ years, as well as people's perspectives, my own included. So let's get started!

First of all, I want to preface this saying I very much support DIY, but I also understand not everyone has the skill set, time, money, or general capability to make their own things. This post isn't meant to shame people who choose to DIY or those who are unable to DIY for whatever reason. We all have our own stories and I'm not here to judge or look down on people in different positions from myself. With that being said, let's get into the actual content here.

When I was a young lass (my father took me into the... Wait, getting off topic here) I was raised to be rather frugal and depend on myself to meet my demands where I could. I learned sewing and crochet from my parents sometime before I have solid memories and many other crafts have come fairly easily to me. (Not including chainmail, but that's a different story.) If I wanted a new doll or stuffed kitten dress, I made it with the plentiful fabric we had lying around from my parent's past projects. When I first started getting into anime and lolita fashion back in the early 2000s, I didn't have the money or resources to buy lolita clothes or cosplays from the wonderful land of Nippon. So I made do and made my own, even if they weren't the best quality. As I got older and my style started changing, as well as my disposable income, I learned how to order online, but my first thought was always "Oh, I could make that." So I'd buy fabric and thread or beads and ribbon and attempt to fashion my own clothing and accessories, looking up tutorials online where I needed to. Sometimes it worked, sometimes I spent my money on a learning experience instead of a completed item. Either way, I forged ahead, convinced that it'd be easier to make things than to buy them. And I know I'm not alone in that.

Many of us who've been into lolita or other J-fashion for years grew up in an age where the only way you could get Japanese brand was by having a friend who visited Japan or going there oneself. And times have changed. Gone are the days of making a JSK with a bedsheet because Baby the Stars Shine Bright doesn't ship to your country. Gone are the days of having to make your own accessories because you don't have access to the style you want. We live in a day and age where you can find and buy just about anything you could want from the comfort of your own home. So why DIY if you can just buy something for 5 bucks off Wish or Amazon?

Well, there's a lot of reasons, but here's a few I personally find myself making:

• For fun
• Internetphobia?
• It's cheaper
• Sustainability

DIY For the Fun of it

A lot of folks who choose to DIY do it for the fun of it. You take time to yourself, you get an enjoyable passtime, and even an end product! Even if none of the other variables I mentioned concern you, it can be relaxing and fulfilling making something for oneself or for others. And if you make a huge mess and don't end up with a useable end product? At least you tried and learned something in the process!

Wait, I Can Use the Internet for That?

So this might just be a me thing, but I find myself forgetting that all the pretty sparklies I see online are only seperated from me by a few clicks and shipping time. I tend to prioritize buying things in person that kinda generally sorta work over the things I actually like and want online because "this is cheaper," or "well I know this fits," or even just "hey, this could give me immediate gratification instead of waiting a month for the end result!" I'd like to think I'm not alone in this, but I'm so used to having to "make do" with what's available, I sometimes spend more money on things I eventually get rid of than I do on the thing I wanted in the first place. But wait, isn't DIY supposed to be an affordable option?

I Could Make That for Half the Cost!

...Or so we'd like to think when we see $500 dresses online and $50 necklaces. Is that really the case though? If you're a skilled crafter who has access to the same sorts of materials used in those "overpriced" items, maybe. But if you're a skilled crafter, you also recognize that cost usually has more meaning to it than just being an arbitrary price. It factors in the materials, the skilled labor and/or specialized machinery needed, the time spent making the item, and how many are being made. The unlined lolita dress you made with $2 a yard fabric from Joann's isn't going to compare to a $200 dress from Angelic Pretty. The $5 necklace you made isn't going to have the same quality and finishing touches and the $30 one from Liz Lisa. If you really can make an item of comprable quality to what you see online, chances are you'll end up spending a lot more money than the original would have cost as well a lot of your valuable time. If you're just making something for fun and you don't mind it looking as professional as the original item though, there's no real harm in buying a $5 bag of beads and some stretch cord and making lots of bracelets and necklaces for yourself. And if you have the skills to turn a bedsheet into a detailed lolita dress, then go for it! Just remember that not everything you see online can be made exactly the same in your living room for a lesser cost. But what about items that aren't expensive? Like that 20 pack of hairclips you saw on Wish for $2?

But is it Sustainable?

An emerging "trend" of sorts that's becoming more and more popular, especially among my generation and younger generations, is sustainability and ethically sourced products. Not to be overly political, but put simply by our favorite Science Guy, "The planet's on [effing] fire," and a lot of us want to do what we can to keep that from getting worse. Sustainable shopping and ethical buying decisions are sometimes more important than simply liking a product for many people. Those impossibly cheap items online? There's no telling what their quality will be until you get the actual item and if you're paying $5 for something that should cost $200, there's a lot more to worry about. As I mentioned before, items made by reputable brands tend to factor the cost of their workers that make the items into their price as well as material costs. So that low quality item you're purchasing could just as easily be made by a very low paid, possibly otherwise mistreated worker. And that's not even factoring in where the materials for that product came from.

So then, you may ask, what makes DIYing better than straight up buying something? Well, that's a tough question to answer. There's really no way to know where the materials you buy came from, especially if you're trying to save money by buying inexpensive materials. And if you buy quality materials from reputable manufacturers, it could end up costing you as much or more than buying the item in the first place. So how are we supposed to decide? Honestly, there's no easy answer. That's the real reason I wanted to write this post, to kinda vent my own frustrations and also give others the oportunity to see things from my perspective. In the short term, everything seems so complicated, but if we start making informed decisions now, maybe there can be less grey area in the future. And that's a start.

What are your guys's opinions? Do you tend to opt to DIY or do you choose to buy things already made instead? Let me know in the comments below!

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Liz Lisa: First Impressions as a Curvy Girl

Hello everyone! Long time no post. Life's been rather complicated for me in the past few years and unfortunately blog posting took a back seat to my instagram as welk as more pressing life issues. But I'm here, at least for today, with my first experience wearing a Liz Lisa dress. For the sake of brevity, I'll post about other items I have from them in a different post All pictures are stock images unless otherwise noted b/c I am not in a position to take nice photos atm.

So first of all, what is Liz Lisa? Liz Lisa (LL for short) is a Japanese fashion brand focusing on "Retro Girlish" fashion stating (as translated by Google Translate) "We propose a fashionable style that fuses the retro style with the trend and retains the [']cute['] style of a woman. A woman who is sensitive to trends but who can enjoy her own style." LL's pieces have generally been considered Hime Kaji fashion in the past and generally consist of soft florals, lace, ruffles, flared skirts, and elegant detailing leading to a soft, feminine, yet still cute, look. Unfortunately, like many Japanese brands, most of their pieces outside of shoes are one size targeted towards smaller Japanese frames. This means their items generally fit a US XS or S. However, I decided to take a chance and buy a LL dress with a half shirred back both because it was cute and for super scientific research purposes.

So first things first, let's talk about my measurements and general size since my main reason for making this post is for the sake of others like myself who want to wear Japanese fashions, but are worried they might be too big. Measurements are approximate since I haven't measured myself in a little while, so they may be an inch or two off. I converted all measurements to their approximate cm equivalent as well.
Height: 5'4"/163cm
Bust: 35"/89cm
Waist: 30"/76cm
Hips: 45"/114cm

As you might have noticed, my hip measurement is significantly larger than my other two, meaning that I am pear shaped. Also worth noting is that in addition to a large butt I also have thicc thighs, a shortish torso, and somewhat broad shoulders. I'm also a bit chubby, but any weight fluctiatuons I have mostly affects my waist measurement as long as it's not caused by muscle gain. So with all of that in mind, let's talk about the dress and how it fits me.

English Rose frill OP in pink (162-6006-1)

Unfortunately since this is a slightly older item from 2016's Autum collection I haven't had much luck finding the official measurements and the seller I purchased from took down the listing, so I can't reference that either. Below are the measurements I could find as well as notable features.
Bust: 85cm (34in)
Shoulder (presumably flat): 32cm (13in)
Sleeve length: 60cm (24in)
Overall Length: 72cm (28in)

• Half back shirring
• Side zipper
• Fully lined bodice and skirt

Potato quality try-on

So, first things first, when I innitially tried the dress on, I was wearing my regular pushup bra and it was rather tight, so I switched to a less padded bralette, which made the fit much less constricting. Both times pulling the zipper up the last half of the way was a bit challenging. I definitely couldn't have put this dress on as easily without the side zip.

Secondly, the waist of the dress hit a bit high on me due in part to my very much not flat-chested-ness. When worn it sits more on the bottom of my ribs than my natural waist.

Thirdly, and most importantly for me, the skirt lining juuuuuuust barely fits over my hips and the skirt itself comes maybe 3 inches below my bum. This means that I DEFINITELY need to wear some sort of shorts underneath to avoid accidentally flashing people and when wearing it out I need to be careful sitting and bending over in it.

Also worth mentioning, the shoulders of the dress are a little bit tight on me, but that's normal for me even with fitted, non-stretch blouses in my size from the US. The sleeves were also just a teeny bit short on me, but not really significant enough to be outright noticeable or harm the intended appearance of the dress when worn.

What We Learn?

I knew I was taking a bit of a risk buying this piece, but I figured the shirring would make it more likely to fit me. Luckily, my risk paid off and I have a dress I can wear, albeit a tad uncomfortably, as well as a reference point for future Liz Lisa purchases. Overall, I'll probably lean towards dresses with fully shirred backs and straps for more comfortable wearing in the future. Unfortunately since the bodice is relatively tight on me, this means that any fitted blouses from LL are a straight up nope for me. Luckily they also have tops, often paired with matching skirts, that have straps and shirring, so I could definitely wear those. For skirts, I should also be good to wear them as long as the back is fully shirred or the waist band is fully elasticated. I'm unsure if skirts with built-in modesty shorts (aka sukapan) would fit me, but I'm willing to give them a try if I find one I like and I can always alter the shorts if needed. I may want to lean towards longer skirts where I can in the future, but that won't stop me from buying shorter skirts since I'd be able to wear them at my natural waist too. Overall, I'd say this dress is a great first LL dress for me and a great way to give myself more buying confidence in the future when buying Liz Lisa pieces.

Was this article helpful for you? Are you considered "plus size" in Japanese fashion? Let me know in the comments!

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